How do beautiful women make you feel?

Posted: May 11, 2010 in Uncategorized

THey make me feel scared, unworthy, like they’re gonna reject me. I feel like they’re mean to less attractive people like me.

I feel used when I talk to or work with beautiful women. I don’t know but I think there’s always something wrong with them, like they’re insane or something and they take it out on other people.

Beautiful women make me feel unsure of myself, they make my qualities not only imperfect but atrocious. They make people feel ugly. Beautiful women want it all and expect everyone to give them everything. They don’t like to wait, but they LOVE making others wait. Making them wait means torture for them.

They dress all nice because they feel expected to. They feel they have to prove their beautiful in order to feel there. Sometimes I feel like other people feel the same way of beautiful people. Should I dislike them or feel sorry for them.

Beautiful women aren’t anything they think they are. Sometimes people don’t have to change when all that needs to be changed are the perceptions we have.

When it comes to beautiful women, my perceptions are thrown out of whack.

Beautiful women- I can’t assume anything about them. I go into talking to one with a prejudice. Prejudice isn’t just for skin color or race. It can be for anyone and for any reason. Like beatiful woman. The beautiful woman is the anyone and the any reason is the assumption that they hate me upon sight (or something close to that)

In conclusion, there’s nothing really wrong with beautiful woman; I’m sure most of them are kind and thoughtful and are very patient. What I’ve learned is that I haven’t been thiking about the beautiful women I’ve met in my life that were genuinely kind and I’ve been focusing on the ones who were mean and stuff, so when I see a pretty girl or meet one, I’d only pick up on their negative qualities.

I think it’s called selective perception and I have a lot of it and it keeps me from being open minded. I think I got it from my mom, but that doesn’t mean it’s too late to change. It’s just hard to change when you don’t know how or you feel what the fuck do I have to change for; what the fuck does that even mean?

How do you change? I think you can’t change all this shit about you but you can change some things. I would only want to change the things that other people on’t like to see in me right? Or should I only change the stuff I think is wrong with me?

It’s too confusing. I am very afraid of talking to strangers even though I can with the right energies. There’s a lot of different reasosn for my fears. The thing I want to change about me is the stuff that people are annoyed by. But wait… I don’t care what they think of me yet I care about how they think of me…

It doesn’t make sense. Like I said, it’s sodamn confusing I don’t know how to go about approaching this whole “change” thing. I remember Obama’s campaign was always about “Change” or “Hope.” We must’ve hated our country really bad to base a whole candidates campaign on it’s horribleness. Change and Hope? Damn…

Anyway, I’m not gonna cha`nge just yet. I think I change regardless of whether I know I’m doing it. I caan change when I grow up. Yeah. I’ll just grow up and hope my bad qualities will go away… or will they just get worse/ harder to change as the years go by??




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